“Inside every fat man there is a thin man trying to get out.”

CYRIL’S PRECURSOR TO THE FAMOUS SAYING: “Imprisoned in every fat man a thin one is wildly signalling to be let out.”        Cyril Connolly (1903-1974)        English writer, editor and critic         An oft-cited line from Connolly’s book The Unquiet Grave, pt. 2 (first published in 1944)         Cyril Connolly is frequently credited as the originator of the modern proverbial saying “Inside every fat man there is a thin man trying to get out,” also heard with the ending “…struggling to get out.” Some sources trace it to an earlier quote by English author George Orwell. In fact, neither of the commonly-used versions of the quip are what Connolly or Orwell actually wrote.          Connolly’s line in his book of essays The Unquiet Grave is: “Imprisoned in every fat man a thin one is wildly signalling to be let out.”        Orwell’s earlier quote mentions the idea of a thin man inside a fat one, but says nothing about the thin man signaling (to use the modern American spelling) or struggling to get out. In his 1939 novel Coming Up For Air the central character, George Bowling, says: “I’m fat, but I’m thin inside. Has it ever struck you that there’s a thin man inside every fat man, just as they say there’s a statue inside every block of stone?”

KINGSLEY’S COROLLARY: “Outside every fat man there was an even fatter man trying to close in.”         Kingsley Amis (1922-1995)        English novelist, critic and poet        In his novel One Fat Englishman (1963)

THE BELLY WISDOM THEOREM: “The old saying is wrong: It’s not that ‘Inside every fat woman there's a thin woman screaming to get out.’ The reality is that inside EVERY woman, there's a FAT woman trying to get out and breathe, relax her belly center, undo her pants, let her thighs roar with thunder, and her breasts feel the breeze!”        Bell Pine Art Farm        From the company’s description of its “Belly Wisdom” statuette

THE RUPAUL RULE: “Inside every gay man, there is a big, soulful, divalicious black woman vying to get out.”        From a post on The Way I See It Theatre Blog (Aug. 26, 2011)

THE NATIONAL LAMPOON LETTER: “Sirs: Outside every thin Canadian, there's a fat American, screaming to get in.”        A letter to the editor published in National Lampoon, June 1964, attributed to Canadian reader Chris Kelly, but probably written by the editors

THE OLD AGE AXIOM: “Inside every old person is a young person wondering what the hell happened.”        Modern proverbial saying and t-shirt slogan, sometimes attributed to American gospel singer Cora Harvey Armstrong and sometimes to the British fantasy and science fiction novelist Terry Pratchett.

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“Children of the night. What music they make!”

THE CLASSIC BOOK AND MOVIE QUOTES: “Listen to them, the children of the night. What music they make!” [1924 novel] “Listen to them. Children of the night. What music they make!” [1931 movie]        Dracula         One of his most famous lines in the novel by Bram Stoker and the popular Universal Studios movie adaptation         In Stoker’s novel and the 1931 film Dracula, starring Bela Lugosi as Count Dracula, the title character says the “children of the night” lines about the wolves howling outside his castle in Transylvania. The book and movie versions of the quotation are almost identical, with the exception of the word the in front of children in the book.        Dracula says the lines to Jonathan Harker, a British legal solicitor who is sent to Dracula’s home to facilitate the Count’s purchase of a property in England. The quote comes early in the book (in Chapter 2) and in the movie, as do two other famous quotes that are well known to Dracula fans.        As Harker enters the Count’s spooky castle, Dracula greets him with the words: “I am Dracula, and I bid you welcome.” In the 1931 movie, this is broken into two lines, separated by a comment by Harker.        In the movie, as Dracula is standing on the huge stone stairway after welcoming Harker, they hear the wolves howling and Lugosi speaks the famous “children of the night” lines. Shortly thereafter, in the next scene, Dracula serves some food to Harker, then pours him a glass of “very old wine.”        “Aren’t you drinking?” asks Harker. Lugosi, smiling, says a third line immortalized by the movie: “I never drink – wine.”        This chuckleworthy nod to the fact that Dracula survives solely by drinking human blood is not in the novel. In that, as Harker is preparing to eat, Dracula apologizes for not joining him, saying: “I have dined already, and I do not sup.” He does offer Harker some “very old tokay wine.” But he says nothing about never drinking wine himself.

CLASSIC COMEDY SPOOF VERSION #1: “Children of the night – shut up!”        Actor George Hamilton as Dracula, in the comedy movie Love at First Bite (1979)        Hamilton says the line in the opening of the movie as he’s playing the piano and the howling of wolves interrupts and annoys him.

CLASSIC COMEDY SPOOF VERSION #2:     “Children of the night. What a mess they make.”        Actor Leslie Nielsen, as Dracula, in Dead and Loving It (1995)        In this campy version, Nielsen says the line after pointing to some bats flying above him as he stands on the stone stairway of his castle. The camera briefly shows a dollop of bat poop on one of the stone steps. Then we see Nielsen’s shoe step on the poo, causing him to slip and fall down the stairs.

NOT-SO-CLASSIC MOVIE VARIATION #1: “Fame has bitten Robert Pattinson...His mere arrival at a promotional autograph session is enough to set off a sonic frenzy of squeals and shrieks. Tweens, teens and Twilight moms scream en masse with pent-up desire and devotion, delighted to just gaze upon their idol in the flesh. Listen to them. Children of the night. What a racket they make.”        Susan Wloszczyna        American movie reviewer        In an article about Pattinson in USA TODAY published in 2008, at a time when the first movie in the Twilight series was suddenly making him a huge celebrity – at least among teenage movie fans.        Pattinson has suggested he’s not personally a fan of the movies that made him world famous. In one interview, when asked what his view of the series might be if he weren't in it, he responded: “I would just mindlessly hate it.”

NOT-SO-CLASSIC MOVIE VARIATION #2: “The entertainment value in Argento’s sad, befuddled decline wears thin before long; after that it’s just boring. It isn’t until the 70-minute mark that the promise of the opening credits – ‘and Rutger Hauer as Van Helsing’ – is fulfilled, and by then it’s too late for anything to salvage the wreck. Listen to the children of the night! What garbage they make.”        Eric D. Snider        American movie reviewer        In his review of Dario Argento’s movie Dracula 3D, posted on Movies.com site on May 20, 2012

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That which doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. (Or not.)

NIETZSCHE’S FAMOUS MAXIM: “What does not kill me makes me stronger.” (“Was mich nicht umbringt macht mich stärker.”)        Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)        German philosopher        His famous maxim in Twilight of the Idols (1888)         The sayings “That which doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” “That which doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” and similar lines are all descendants of the aphorism above, which comes from the “Maxims and Arrows” section of Nietzsche’s book Twilight of the Idols. His original German line has been translated in several ways. Sometimes “Whatever” or “That which” is used in place of “What.” Sometimes “destroy” or some other verb is used in place of “kill” (though the German word Nietzsche used, umbringt, is derived from the verb umbringen, which is generally translated as meaning “to kill”).               Today, English translations and variations of Nietzsche’s maxim are often used for ironic effect. But they are also frequently used in a positive way, to express optimism and determination in the face of adversity.

JAX TELLER’S COUNTERQUOTE: “There’s an old saying: that which doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I don’t believe that. I think the things that try to kill you make you angry and sad. Strength comes from the good things — your family, your friends, the satisfaction of hard work. Those are the things that keep you whole. Those are the things to hold on to when you’re broken.”        Jackson “Jax” Teller (played by actor Charlie Hunnam)         Speaking in a voiceover in the “Sovereign” episode of the TV series Sons of Anarchy. (Season 5, Episode 1. First aired September 11, 2012)

CHUCK LORRE’S COUNTERQUOTE: “What doesn’t kill us makes us bitter. I used to believe that to be both funny and true...I now have a thicker skin, I’m less likely to sweat the small stuff, and, perhaps most importantly, I have a renewed sense of humility. All in all, better. That being said, I still try to stay reasonably bitter in order to maintain my eligibility in the Writers Guild of America.”          Chuck Lorre        American TV show producer        An excerpt from one of the popular “vanity cards” shown at the end of television shows he produces. This one comes from the “Spy Gaming” episode of his sitcom Big Bang Theory. (Season 4 Episode 22, first aired on May 5, 2011.) Lorre picked What Doesn't Kill Us Makes Us Bitter as the title of a book collecting his TV vanity cards.

TAYARI’S COUNTERQUOTE: “People say, That which doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. But they are wrong. What doesn’t kill you, doesn’t kill you. That’s all you get. Sometimes, you just have to hope that’s enough.”                         Tayari Jones        American novelist        In the epilogue of her novel Silver Sparrow (2011)

CHOKO’S COUNTER-COUNTERQUOTE: “Of course, what doesn’t make you stronger, will kill you, so there’s also that.”                        Kaarli Sylvester Makela (a.k.a. Choko)        American author        In her book Pure Speculation: One Juggalo’s Strange Story (2005)

See more witty variations of “What does not kill me…” in this previous QuoteCounterquote.com post . . . 

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“We have met the enemy and he is us.”

THE FAMOUS EARTH DAY SLOGAN: “We have met the enemy and he is us.”        Walt Kelly (1913-1973)        American cartoonist best known for his Pogo comic strip        Kelly used this memorable line on a poster designed to help promote environmental awareness and publicize the first annual observance of Earth Day, held on April 22, 1970. It’s based on “We have met the enemy and they are ours” — the famous report made by American Navy Commodore Oliver Hazard Perry on September 10, 1813, after defeating a British naval squadron on Lake Erie during the War of 1812. (For more background see the April 22 Earth Day post on ThisDayinQuotes.com.)

THE ANTI-US KILLERS VERSION: “We have met the enemy, and he is not us. He is a shadowy figure that hates the Western world, hates freedom, hates women, and hates liberty of the individual.”        A post on the “Evil Professor” blog about anti-American terrorists

THE KILLER KITTIES VERSION: “We have met the enemy, and they are our cats. A report published in Nature asserts that cats might kill as many as 20 billion mammals — and possibly more than three million birds — every year.”        MSN news brief about a study that concluded cats that roam outdoors are one of the top threats to wildlife. The story noted one old-fashioned way of reducing the carnage your cat may cause (besides keeping it indoors): put a bell on its collar.

THE MOVIE BUZZKILL VERSION:   “A wasted opportunity to explore one of the last great moments of American dissent. We have met the enemy, and it is dull.”        Alonso Duralde        Movie critic for Reuters’ TheWrap.com        In his review of The Company You Keep, Robert Redford’s film about aging radicals who were members of the Weather Underground in the 1960s.

To read more “We have met the enemy…” variations, see this previous post on QuoteCounterquote.com…

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“None so blind as those that will not see.”

THE BIBLE-RELATED QUOTE THAT’S NOT IN THE BIBLE: “None so blind as those that will not see.”        Matthew Henry (1662-1714)        English Presbyterian minister and writer        A saying popularized by Henry’s use in his Commentary on the Whole Bible (1708)        Contrary to common belief, this is not a quote from the Bible. It’s a proverbial English saying with no clear origin. Matthew Henry helped popularize it by using it several times in his widely-read book of explanatory comments about the Bible. The saying was probably inspired by Bible verses, possibly Matthew 13:13 (“Therefore I speak to them in parables: because they seeing see not…”) or Jeremiah 5:21 (“Hear now this, O foolish people, and without understanding; which have eyes, and see not…”).

THE LAME EXCUSE VARIATION: “There are none so lame as those who will not walk.”        Sir James Marchant (1867-1956)        British philanthropist and author        In the book If I Had Only One Sermon to Preach (1928)

THE TRUE BELIEVER PRINCIPLE: “There are none so positive as those who are but half right.”        William McDonnell (1814-1900)        Canadian writer        In his novel Family Creeds (1879)

SPURGEON’S VERSION:        “There are none so tender as those who have been skinned themselves.”         Rev. Charles Haddon Spurgeon (1834-1892)        British Baptist preacher        From a sermon included in his book Sermons: Volume 6 (1859)

THE UNWORTHY WISH LIST VERSION: “There are none so bitterly disappointed as those who have got what they wanted, because human nature is so sadly prone to want such things as are unworthy.”        Ellen Thorneycroft Fowler (1860-1929)        British poet and novelist        In her novel Place and Power (1903)

THE IRRITATING BLOWHARDS PRINCIPLE: “None so empty as those who are full of themselves.”        Benjamin Whichcote (1609–1683)        British Puritan divine and scholar        Quoted in the book Moral and Religious Aphorisms Collected from the Manuscript Papers of the Reverend and Learned Doctor Whichcote (1753)

THE IRRITATING CRITICS PRINCIPLE: “There’s none so bland as can’t see.”        Editorial comment in a 1994 issue of the Theatre Record        Regarding a critic’s negative review of an avant-garde adaptation of Shakespeare’s Richard III

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