“The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.”

THE FAMOUS MISQUOTE: “The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.”        Attributed to Mark Twain (1835-1910)        American humorist, journalist, novelist and social critic        According to a widely-repeated legend, Twain made this quip when he heard there were rumors he had died and that one newspaper had printed his obituary. Another common variation of the line uses the words “…have been greatly exaggerated.” Sometimes the quip is given as “Reports of my death are grossly exaggerated.”        However, all of the commonly-heard versions using “greatly exaggerated” or “grossly exaggerated” are misquotes.        As noted in many scholarly books of quotations and explained in a post on my This Day in Quotes blog, what Twain actually said was “The report of my death was an exaggeration.”        The origin of the more familiar misquote versions of Twain’s response seems to be an embellished anecdote in Chapter 197 of Albert Bigelow Paine’s biography of Twain, which was published in 1912, two years after Twain’s death.

A RECENT PARAPHRASE BY PRESIDENT OBAMA: “As Mark Twain said, you know, rumors of my demise may be a little exaggerated at this point.”        President Barack Obama        His response during a White House press conference on April 30, 2013, when a reporter asked if he still had the political “juice” needed to get his legislative proposals passed by Congress, in light of his recent high profile failures to get gun control and budget legislation approved.

THE DICK CHENEY INVERSE PARAPHRASE: “The rumors that Cheney is alive are somewhat exaggerated. It’s Mark Twain in reverse.”        Hans Blix        Swedish diplomat and politician        His answer in a 2004 interview in the New York Times when asked if US Vice President Dick Cheney had seemed more “wooden” than President George W. Bush during a meeting Blix had with them prior to the Second Gulf War (a.k.a. the 2003 invasion of Iraq).        Blix led the international weapons inspection teams charged with determining if Iraq had weapons of mass destruction, a claim Bush and Cheney pushed as the main reason to invade the country. As Blix pointed out, no WMDs were found. Of course, this fact was was dismissed by Bush and Cheney.

THE SOAP OPERA VERSION: “Rumors of my chastity have been greatly exaggerated.”        Donna Martin, a character played by actress Tori Spelling in the TV series Beverly Hills, 90210        One of her wisecracks in the “Reunion” episode (Season 8, Ep. 27, first aired April 15, 1998)

THE SPACE OPERA VERSION: “Reports of my assimilation have been greatly exaggerated.”        Captain Jean-Luc Picard, played by actor Patrick Stewart        A quip Picard makes in the movie Star Trek: First Contact (1996), in which some crew members of the USS Enterprise are “assimilated” by the part-machine, part-organic, hive-like life form(s) called the Borg.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Comments? Corrections? Post them on the Famous Quotations Facebook page.

Related reading and viewing…

“Art for art’s sake.” (“L’art pour l’art.”)

COUSIN’S FAMOUS EARLY USE: “Art for art’s sake.” (“L’art pour l’art”)        Victor Cousin (1792-1867)        French philosopher         Famous phrase first used by Cousin in a lecture at the Sorbonne (University of Paris) in 1818        Cousin is widely credited with either coining or uttering the first notable public use of the phrase “l’art pour l’art,” during his lecture on aesthetics titled “Du Vrai, du Beau, et du Bien” (“Truth, Beauty and Goodness”). In his hifalutin’ remarks on those topics, Cousin said:          “We must have religion for religion’s sake, morality for morality’s sake, as with art for art’s sake...the beautiful cannot be the way to what is useful, or to what is good, or to what is holy; it leads only to itself.”          Cousin’s use gave the concept of “art for art’s sake” it’s initial notoriety. However, credit for popularizing and promoting it to encourage the creation of art that is not limited by realism or social usefulness is generally given to the French writer and art critic Théophile Gautier, who began using it in the mid-1830s. It became a philosophical basis of the so-called Aesthetic Movement in art and literature that developed in the 19th Century.

HUGO’S OBSERVATION: “Art for art’s sake exists in nature more than is believed.”         Victor Hugo (1802-1885)         French novelist, playwright and poet        From his novel L’Homme Qui Rit (The Man Who Laughs), first published in 1869

CAO YU’S OBSERVATION: “Art for art’s sake is a philosophy of the well-fed.”         Cao Yu (1910-1996)        Chinese playwright        Quoted in the London Observer, April 13, 1980

SAND’S VISIONARY VARIATION: “Art for art’s sake is an empty phrase. Art for the sake of the true, art for the sake of the good and the beautiful, that is the faith I am searching for.”         George Sand (pseudonym of Baroness Amandine Aurore Lucile Dupin; 1804-1876)        French writer        Comment in a letter to her friend Alexandre Saint-Jean in 1872

FREBERG’S PECUNIARY VARIATION: “ARS GRATIA PECUNIAE.” (“Art for the sake of money.”)        Stan Freberg (b. 1926)        American comic genius and occasional ad man        Motto on the “The Great Seal of Freberg,” which features a a seal with sunglasses. Devised for his advertising agency “Freberg Ltd. (But Not Very).”

ABBEY’S IDEOLOGY VARIATION: “Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of the cancer cell.”        Edward Abbey (1927-1989)        American writer and environmental activist        In his article “Grow and Die,” published in Penthouse magazine, September 1979

THE MOVIE VERSION: “ARS GRATIA ARTIS”        The famed motto of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer studios        Around 1916, Hollywood publicist Howard Dietz was asked to develop a motto for Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer studios. He came up with “Ars gratia artis,” a Latin version of the phrase “art for art’s sake.”        Through most of the decades since then, the motto has appeared over the image of a roaring lion at the beginning of films produced by MGM.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Comments? Corrections? Post them on the Famous Quotations Facebook group.

Related reading…

“We have met the enemy and he is us.”

THE FAMOUS EARTH DAY SLOGAN: “We have met the enemy and he is us.”        Walt Kelly (1913-1973)        American cartoonist best known for his Pogo comic strip        Kelly used this memorable line on a poster designed to help promote environmental awareness and publicize the first annual observance of Earth Day, held on April 22, 1970. It’s based on “We have met the enemy and they are ours” — the famous report made by American Navy Commodore Oliver Hazard Perry on September 10, 1813, after defeating a British naval squadron on Lake Erie during the War of 1812. (For more background see the April 22 Earth Day post on ThisDayinQuotes.com.)

THE ANTI-US KILLERS VERSION: “We have met the enemy, and he is not us. He is a shadowy figure that hates the Western world, hates freedom, hates women, and hates liberty of the individual.”        A post on the “EvilProf” blog about anti-American terrorists

THE KILLER KITTIES VERSION: “We have met the enemy, and they are our cats. A report published in Nature asserts that cats might kill as many as 20 billion mammals — and possibly more than three million birds — every year.”        MSN news brief about a study that concluded cats that roam outdoors are one of the top threats to wildlife. The story noted one old-fashioned way of reducing the carnage your cat may cause (besides keeping it indoors): put a bell on its collar.

THE MOVIE BUZZKILL VERSION:   “A wasted opportunity to explore one of the last great moments of American dissent. We have met the enemy, and it is dull.”        Alonso Duralde        Movie critic for Reuters’ TheWrap.com        In his review of The Company You Keep, Robert Redford’s film about aging radicals who were members of the Weather Underground in the 1960s.

To read more “We have met the enemy…” variations, see this previous post on QuoteCounterquote.com…

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Comments? Corrections? Post them on the Famous Quotations Facebook page.

Related reading…

“Nothing is certain except death and taxes.” (Or, as Franklin actually said: “Il n’y a rien d’assure que la mort et les impôts.”

THE FAMOUS WORDS FRANKLIN DIDN’T SAY (IN ENGLISH): “Nothing is certain except death and taxes.”        Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)         American “founding father,” publisher, diplomat and scientist         This is the usual English translation of a comment Franklin made in a letter he wrote to French scientist Jean-Baptiste Leroy, dated November 13, 1789.        Franklin wrote his letter to Leroy in French. His “death and taxes” remark was related to the Constitution of the United States of America, which had been adopted two years earlier. What he actually wrote was:        “Notre constitution nouvelle est actuellement établie, tout paraît nous promettre qu’elle sera durable; mais, dans ce monde, il n’y a rien d’assure que la mort et les impôts.”        The common English translation of this sentence is: “Our new Constitution is now established, everything seems to promise it will be durable; but, in this world, nothing is certain except death and taxes.”  (Sometimes the last part is translated as “Nothing is certain but death and taxes.”)        As noted by the invaluable Phrase Finder site and other reference sources, similar quotations about death and taxes pre-date Franklin’s letter. But the English translation of Franklin’s version is certainly the most famous. (For more background see this post on my ThisDayinQuotes.com blog.)

THE UNCERTAIN WILL ROGERS QUOTE:   “The difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.”        Attrib. to Will Rogers (1879-1935)        American humorist        A quip widely attributed to Rogers, but without any specific source        There’s no contemporary record of Rogers uttering or writing this old joke. However, quote maven Barry Popik has noted that a similar line was used by another humorist Rogers had a connection with, the witty newspaper columnist Robert Quillen (1887-1948).        In several of the humorous columns Quillen wrote in the early 1930s, he said the “difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time the legislature meets.” In a 1934 column, Quillen added Congress, saying: “The main difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get any worse every time congress or the state legislature meets.” That same year, movie producer George Marshall and screenwriter Lamar Trotti visited Quillen and purportedly used him as the model for the newspaper editor Will Rogers played in the film Life Begins at Forty. The film’s credits credit Quillen for “contributing dialogue.” My guess is that, if Rogers ever did use the line about Congress, he may have borrowed it from Quillen.

SCARLET O’HARA’S BABY BIRTHIN’ VERSION: “Death and taxes and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them!”        Margaret Mitchell (1900-1949)        American novelist, journalist and philanthropist          This is what the character Scarlett O’Hara says about the “untimeliness” of her pregnancy, in Chapter 38 of Mitchell’s 1936 novel Gone with the Wind.         The line was not used in the classic 1939 movie adaptation, in which actress Vivien Leigh played Scarlet. But if it had been, I imagine her adding “Fiddle-dee-dee!”

SOMETHING YOU DON’T WANT YOUR DOCTOR TO SAY: “In life only one thing is certain, besides death and taxes...No matter how hard we try, No matter how good our intentions, we are going to make mistakes.”        Dr. Meredith Grey (played by Ellen Pompeo)        In the “Heart of the Matter” episode of the TV show Grey’s Anatomy (Season 4, Episode 4, first aired Oct. 18, 2007)

A GOLF ADDICT’S COUNTERQUOTE: “Ben Franklin was wrong. There is more certainty in life than just death and taxes. There is also the very reliable need for ‘just one more’ piece of golf equipment.”        Dorothy Langley        American author and golfer        In her book A View from the Red Tees: The Truth About Women and Golf (1997)

THE 20TH CENTURY OUTLOOK: “To the typical American on the eve of the twentieth century it appeared a unique country, a land of promise where one person's gain was another person’s opportunity, and the inevitable was not just death and taxes but improvement and growth.”        Richard M. Abrams        Historian and Professor Emeritus, University of California at Berkeley        An observation in his book The Burdens of Progress, 1900-1929 (1978)

THE 21ST CENTURY OUTLOOK: “Besides death and  taxes, this too is certain: The American economy will never return to its  maximum prosperity until it completes a very broad-based tax reform.”         Economists Glenn Hubbard and Peter Navarro        In their book Seeds of Destruction: Why the Path to Economic Ruin Runs Through Washington, and How to Reclaim American Prosperity (2010)

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Comments? Corrections? Post them on the Famous Quotations Facebook page.

Related reading and viewing…

“Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.”

THE HEAVENLY CONUNDRUM POPULARIZED BY A SONG: “Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.”        Tom (Thomas Henry) Delaney (1889-1963)        African-American blues and jazz composer, pianist for Ethel Waters        Title of (and lyric from) a song Delany wrote sometime prior to 1948        According to research by quote maven and Oxford English Dictionary contributor Barry Popik, the earliest verifiable use of this insightful saying seems to be as a song title and lyric by Delaney. The date of the song’s composition is uncertain, but it was mentioned as one of Delaney’s popular sings in an article about him in The Afro American newspaper on October 16, 1948. Delaney was a prolific blues and jazz music composer whose career started in the 1920s. His early hits included “Down Home Blues” (1921), popularized by Ethel Waters, and “Jazz Me Blues,” first recorded by Lillyn Brown, the “Indian Princess,” in 1921 and later covered by many other jazz singers and musicians. In 1950, a version of “Everybody Wants to Go to Heaven, but Nobody Wants to Die” was recorded by Tommy Dorsey and his orchestra, using the spelling “Ev’rybody wants to go to Heaven (But Nobody Wants to Die).” The writing credits on that popular version were given to three people: Tom Delaney and the pioneering African-American comedians and musicians Timmie Rogers and Al Fields. (There’s a video of Rogers performing it on YouTube.) One recent book cites “Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die” as an African-American proverb, which suggests that it might not have been coined by Delaney. However, I searched the Internet and online newspaper archives and, although I did find a few examples of similar quotes, I found no prior uses of the specific line used in Delaney’s song. So, at the least, his song appears to have popularized the saying and it looks like Delaney may have coined it. Since 1950, the line has been appropriated as the title of, or in the lyrics of, other songs by various musicians, including bluesman Albert King and country stars Loretta Lynn and Kenny Chesney. My own favorite musical use of the line is in the song “Equal Rights,” by the late Reggae music pioneer Peter Tosh. (NOTE: The illustration at left is from a greeting card sold on Zazzle.com. I’m not quite sure what occasion it’s supposed to be used for.)

THE TAX CONUNDRUM: “The modern budget covers many items for community benefit unknown a century ago... While nobody wants high taxes, practically everybody wants the things that make taxes high.”         The Wisconsin State Tax Commission        This observation, from the Commission’s Biennial Report to the Wisconsin Legislature in 1916, seems just as true now as it was nearly a century ago.

THE PEACE AND FREEDOM VS. WAR AND TYRANNY CONUNDRUM: “Almost all of us long for peace and freedom; but very few of us have much enthusiasm for the thoughts, feelings and actions that make for peace and freedom. Conversely almost nobody wants war or tyranny; but a great many people find an intense pleasure in the thoughts, feelings and actions that make for war and tyranny.”        Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)        British writer and social critic        From one of the essays included in Huxley’s book Brave New World Revisited (1958)

THE REGULATION CONUNDRUM: “Nobody wants to be regulated, but everybody wants everybody else regulated.”          George W. Cartwright (1863-1920)         California businessman and state senator        From a speech included in his book Mutual Interests of Labor and Capital (1918)

THE OLD AGE CONUNDRUM: “Every man wants to live long, but no man wants to be old.”         Said to be an ancient Turkish Proverb

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

Comments? Corrections? Post them on the Famous Quotations Facebook group page.

Related listening, viewing and reading…