Alternative versions of the Pledge of Allegiance…

THE ORIGINAL PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE: “I pledge allegiance to my Flag and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.”        Francis Bellamy (1855-1931)         American Baptist minister, Christian Socialist and magazine editor        This is the original Pledge of Allegiance, written by Bellamy and published in the September 8, 1892 issue of The Youth’s Companion magazine. The words were changed several times in following decades. In 1923, at the first National Flag Conference in Washington D.C., “my Flag” was changed to “the flag of the United States.” At the following year’s national Flag Conference, the words “of America” were added. In 1942, that version of the Pledge was made official by Congress. In 1954, Congress passed a resolution which added the words “under God” to the Pledge, creating the current version:       “I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands: one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.”

THE MAD MAGAZINE FLAG POSTER VERSION: “I WILL PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA AND TO THE REPUBLIC FOR WHICH IT STANDS WHEN IT IS ONE NATION UNDER GOD WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL INCLUDING KIKES, WOPS, SPICS, NIGGERS, WASPS, ETC.”         From a poster in a 1971 special issue of MAD magazine (Special Number Five)        These words are printed in capital letters in the red stripes of the poster’s flag image (shown at left).

THE WHITEST KIDS U’ KNOW VERSION: “I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America. Thank you very, very much for letting us little kids live here. It really, really was nice of you. You didn’t have to do it. And it’s really not freaky that us little, little kids mindlessly recite this anthem every day and pledge their life to a government before they’re old enough to really think about what they’re saying. This is not a form of brainwashing. This is not a form of brainwashing. This is not a form of brainwashing. This is really the greatest country in the whole world. All the other countries suck. And, if this country ever goes to war, as it often wants to do, I promise to help go and kill all the other countries’ kids. God bless Johnson & Johnson. God bless GE. God bless Citigroup. Amen.”        From IFC’s Whitest Kids U' Know comedy series        This skit is in Episode 7 of Season 5 (first aired on May 27, 2011).

THE ANIMAL HOUSE VERSION: “I, state your name, do hereby pledge allegiance to the frat with liberty and fraternity for all. Amen.”        The Delta House fraternity pledge, in National Lampoon’s Animal House (1978)

A MATHEMATICIAN’S VERSION: “I pledge my support for the semiautonomous, evolving, complex dynamical network known as the United States of America and for those principles that maximize the degrees of freedom and independence of its human nodes.”        John Allen Paulos        Professor of Mathematics at Temple University        One of a number of alternate versions of the Pledge of Allegiance submitted to the Washington Post for a special section in the July 4, 2005 edition.

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