“The pen is mightier than the sword”

THE FAMOUS QUOTE BY A POLITICIAN/PLAYWRIGHT: “Beneath the rule of men entirely great, The pen is mightier than the sword.”        Edward George Bulwer-Lytton (1803-1873)        British politician and playwright        In his play Richelieu (1839)         Although Bulwer-Lytton’s line “The pen is mightier than the sword” is the most famous use and is often cited as the first, the basic concept was already proverbial and has many predecessors.

A SOLDIER’S COUNTERQUOTE: “Governments may think and say as they like, but force cannot be eliminated, and it is the only real and unanswerable power. We are told that the pen is mightier than the sword, but I know which of these weapons I would choose.”         Adrian Carton de Wiart (1880-1963)        British Army officer and war hero         In his autobiography, Happy Odyssey, first published in 1950         De Wiart’s comment undoubtedly reflects his experiences as a soldier in the Boer War, World War I and World War I. In the course of those conflicts, he lost his left eye, part of an ear, and his left hand. He is considered one of the bravest badasses in military history.

THE TWITTER APPLICATION: “If the pen is mightier than the sword, what does that say about the tweet?”        Matthew A. Russell        American computer scientist and author        An observation he made in his 2011 book Mining the Social Web. It seems even more prescient in view of the role Twitter has played in the rise and presidency of Donald Trump.

CONSERVATIVE COUNTERQUOTE: “We cannot allow the pen to be mightier than the sword!”        Steve Lonegan         Republican politician who became Senior Policy Director for “Americans for Prosperity”        Speaking against the Democrats’ proposed “Affordable Health Care Act” (a.k.a. “Obamacare”) at a December 15, 2009 “Tea Party” protest

JON STEWART’S COUNTER-COUNTERQUOTE: “And, that is why, today, I’ve written my speech with my sword, and...We can’t let the pen be mightier than the sword [!?!] — because that’s ONLY THE BASIS OF OUR CIVILIZATION!”        Jon Stewart         American comedian and political satirist        Making fun of Steve Lonegan’s quote on The Daily Show on December 16, 2009

THE PUNNIEST COUNTERQUOTE: “The pun is mightier than the sword.”         Richard Lederer         American word and phrase maven, author, speaker, and teacher         One of the puns in his book Get Thee to a Punnery (1988)

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Boldly going where no quotes have gone before…

THE ORIGINAL PHRASE FROM THE ORIGINAL SERIES: “To boldly go where no man has gone before.”        Star Trek: The Original Series (first aired 1966-1969)        Famous phrase from the opening sequence of each episode        This is probably the best known and most parodied split infinitive in modern history. It’s from the voiceover introduction to the TV series Star Trek, spoken by actor William Shatner, as Captain James T. Kirk. Any true Trekkie can recite the complete intro: “Space – the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before.”        In the spin-off series, Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987-1994), the words “five-year mission” were changed to “continuing mission” and “no person” replaced “no man,” to be more politically correct. The rest of the Next Gen intro, spoken by actor Patrick Stewart as Captain Jean-Luc Picard, was the same as the Star Trek: TOS version.        At a recent Comic Con in New Orleans, a Star Trek fan asked William Shatner: “Do you boldly go where no man has gone before?” The 80-year-old actor quipped: “It depends on the girl.”

DOUGLAS ADAMS’ THHGTTG QUIP: “Far back in the mists of ancient time, in the great and glorious days of the former Galactic Empire, life was wild, rich and on the whole tax free...And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before.”        Douglas Adams (1952-2001)        British writer especially known in this universe for creating The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy radio, TV and book series        The lines above were spoken by narrator Peter Jones in the third episode of Adams’ original radio series version of THHGTTG

THE INSPIRING “GET RICH CHEATING” VERSION: “There will always be opportunities to cheat. It’s up to you to discover them, to create new ways to Get Rich Cheating. Seek out new unexplored worlds, boldly cheat where no cheater has cheated before. Be the next Barry Bonds, Ashlee Simpson, Rod Blagojevich, or generic, balding,  middle-aged white corporate executive.”        Jeff Kreisler        American actor, author and writer for Comedy Central        Advice in his book Get Rich Cheating: The Crooked Path to Easy Street (2009)

THE UNINSPIRING SPACE PROGRAM VERSION: “I’m tired of driving around the block boldly going where hundreds have gone before in orbit around Earth.”        Neil deGrasse Tyson        American astrophysicist, author and advocate for space exploration        Talking about America’s current space program and his support for manned missions to Mars and beyond, in an interview with Jon Stewart on The Daily Show (January 18, 2011)

THE UNTIRING BABES IN SPACE VERSION: “Space. It’s big. It’s dark. It’s spooky. These are the voyages of the starship Intercourse. The crew’s five minute mission is to spread the seed of humanity to any hot looking babe in a spacesuit, and to boldly cum where no man has cum before.”        Sex Trek: Charly XXX (2007)         Lines from the opening of this porn movie takeoff on Star Trek

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Do Republicans – or Democrats – still have “a big tent”?

QUOTE: “Our party is a big tent. We can house many views on many issues.”        Lee Atwater (1951-1991)        Republican political strategist and “wedge issue” mastermind           Famous comment to reporters, Nov. 14, 1989

COUNTERQUOTE: “The Democratic Party is a big tent. We are widely diversified.”        Thomas P. “Tip” O’Neill (1912-1994)        Democratic House Majority Leader        Comment to a reporter in June 1975

UPDATED QUOTE ABOUT THE GOP: “As you know, if you're a minority or an interest group, the Democrats will hold a debate at your house. Whereas, Republicans take a slightly different approach. They have a big tent – you're just not allowed in it.”        Jon Stewart (b. 1962)        Host of The Daily Show        Quip made on his show, Oct. 1, 2007

UPDATED QUOTE ABOUT THE DEMS: “The ultra left-wing group MoveOn.org has announced that it will begin targeting Democrats who oppose health care reform...[and] plans to help bankroll primary challenges against senators who side with the GOP on the issue of health care. Now wait a minute, I thought the mainstream media said it was Republicans who no longer had the big tent party? I guess the media is wrong.”        Sean Hannity (b. 1961)        Conservative media pundit         Comment on his Fox News show, Nov. 12, 2009

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Just say NO! NOE! NO-J!

NANCY’S FAMOUS ANTI-DRUG SLOGAN: “Just say no!”        Nancy Reagan (b. 1921)        Wife of President Ronald Reagan        Anti-drug slogan she popularized, starting in 1983

DEMOCRATS’ ANTI-DAN SLOGAN: “JUST SAY NOE”        Slogan on a 1992 campaign button worn by Democrats        Mocking Dan Quayle’s misspelling of “potato” as “potatoe”

STEWART’S ANTI-O.J. VERSION: “Just say NO-J.”        1995 TV ads for Jon Stewart’s Daily Show        Satirizing the public’s fascination with TV coverage of the O.J. Simpson murder trial

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