“Life is unfair…”

JFK’S FAMED OBSERVATION: “Life is unfair.”        President John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)        American Democratic politician who served as the 35th President of the United States               This famous pithy quote comes from comments Kennedy made in a press conference on March 21, 1962. It’s one of JFK’s most widely-cited quotations, though few people today are aware of the context. It was part of his response to a question about U.S. Army reservists who had publicly objected to being called up to serve as “military advisors” in Vietnam. Kennedy had recently increased the American military presence in Vietnam to nearly 10,000 troops. Some reservists had expressed their opposition by holding public demonstrations.        When asked about those protests, Kennedy responded: “Some men are killed in a war and some men are wounded, and some men never leave the country, and some men are stationed in the Antarctic and some are stationed in San Francisco. It’s very hard in military or in personal life to assure complete equality. Life is unfair.”        For more background see the entry about this quote on my ThisDayinQuotes.com site and Garson O’Toole’s post about it on his great QuoteInvestigator.com site.

SCALZI’S CLARIFICATION: “There’s a difference between the fact that the universe is inherently unfair on a cosmic level, and the fact that life is unfair because people are actively making it so.”        John Scalzi        American science fiction author         A comment Scalzi made in a post on his blog about homophobia. As he notes in the next sentence in that post: “There’s not much one can do about the former, but the latter is fixable.”

MARABOLI’S MAXIM: “The only thing that makes life unfair is the delusion that it should be fair.”        Steve Maraboli        American behavioral scientist, motivational speaker and author         From his book Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

USTINOV’S UNCONFIRMED QUIP: “Life is unfair but remember sometimes it is unfair in your favor.”        Attributed to Peter Ustinov (1921-2004)        British actor and writer         This quip is attributed to Ustinov by hundreds of posts on the Internet, but none that I found gave any source. If you can confirm that it’s a real quote by Ustinov and know the source, please shoot me an email and let me know.

LOWE’S COUNTERQUOTE: “Nothing in life is unfair. It’s just life.”        Rob Lowe        American actor        In his autobiography Stories I Only Tell My Friends

A THOUGHT ABOUT MARILYN: “At her death the world looked for villains. It found only the troubling truths that life is unfair and cruel, that we see human despair too late, that courage is not always enough.”         From the narration for the classic 1966 documentary film The Legend of Marilyn Monroe, produced shortly after Marilyn’s death.        Script by Theodore Strauss and Terry Sanders (who also directed the film). Actor John Huston is the narrator.

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Faith, hope & charity – from the Bible, to American politics, to Dale Evans & Roy Rogers...

THE FAMILIAR BIBLE VERSE: “And now abideth faith, hope, charity these three; but the greatest of these is charity.”         Saint Paul (c. 5 A.D. - c. 67 A.D.)         I Corinthians 13:13 (i.e., Chapter 13, Verse 13)         I Corinthians, usually referred to as First Corinthians or the First Epistle to the Corinthians is a book in the Bible based on a letter written around 53 A.D. by Paul, an Apostle of Jesus (though not one of the first twelve). Much of the letter provides stern guidance to the congregation of Christians Paul established in Corinth, Greece. He’d heard they were violating some of the rules for followers of the new Christian faith that he helped create. So in his letter, he warned them about various sinful things, such as getting drunk, fornicating (which he mentions many times) and allowing women to go around without covering their head (a strange rule that Muslims and early Christians had in common).        One of the less Puritanical and more inspiring parts of I Corinthians comes in Book 13. In that, Paul discusses the importance of being charitable. It ends with the line that includes the familiar triumvirate “faith, hope, charity” – of which, Paul says, the greatest is charity.         This line is preceded by two that include other famous Bible quotes about putting away childish things (Chap. 13, Verse 11) and seeing through a glass darkly (Chap. 13, Verse 12):        When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.        For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.        And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.

F.D.R.’S POLITICAL VARIATION: “We are poor indeed if this Nation cannot afford to lift from every recess of American life the dread fear of the unemployed that they are not needed in the world...In the place of the palace of privilege we seek to build a temple out of faith and hope and charity.”        Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882-1945)        American Democratic politician elected to serve three terms as President of the United States        In his acceptance speech after receiving the Democratic nomination for his second term as president, at the Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, June 27, 1936.

GOLDWATER’S POLITICAL VARIATION: “Freedom has been the watchword of my political life...I believe in faith, hope, and charity. But none of these is possible without freedom.”        Barry Goldwater (1909-1998)        Republican politician who served U.S. Senator from Arizona for many years and was the Republican Party's nominee for President in 1964         The quote is from his autobiography Goldwater, first published in 1988

POLITICAL VARIATION #3: “America's greatness and variety, its perpetual newness and variety, its bedrock of faith, hope and charity is all too easy to forget. Yet it is always there, rising above the cloud banks of cheap and easy rhetoric like the Rockies above the fruited plain.”        Paul Greenberg        Pulitzer Prize-winning political commentator        Commenting on the uniquely bizarre 2016 presidential campaign in an editorial originally published in the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, May 27, 2016

ORWELL’S TYPICALLY PESSIMISTIC VERSION: “Now abideth faith, hope, money; but the greatest of these is money.”        George Orwell (1903-1950)        English novelist, essayist and journalist        One of his lines from the epigraph he wrote that appears at the beginning of his novel Keep The Aspidistra Flying (1936)

DALE EVANS’ TYPICALLY OPTIMISTIC VERSION: “Have faith, hope and charity That's the way to live successfully How do I know, the Bible tells me so.”        Dale Evans (1912-2001)        Lyrics from the song “The Bible Tells Me So”        Words and music by Dale Evans        Evans wrote the song to perform with her husband Roy Rogers on The Roy Rogers Show. They sang it as a duet in the episode “Ginger Horse,” which originally aired on March 27, 1955. That year it was recorded and further popularized by singer Nick Noble and bandleader Don Cornell. It eventually became one of Dale’s signature songs.

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“Crime does not pay” — and (hopefully) slime won’t either…

THE FAMOUS CAUTIONARY CATCHPHRASE: “Crime does not pay.”        Proverbial saying popularized in the 1930s        Some sources say “Crime does not pay” was coined by Chester Gould, creator of the Dick Tracy comic strip, which debuted in 1931. In fact, although its high-profile use as Tracy’s motto certainly helped popularize the saying, Gould didn’t coin it. Nor did the old time radio show The Shadow, which started airing in 1930 and ended episodes with the famous lines: “The weed of crime bears bitter fruit. Crime does not pay!”        If you search historic news archives, you’ll find many uses of “crime does not pay” in news stories prior to the 1930s. The earliest examples I found were from the 1880s and I suspect it was probably already proverbial before that. However, it does seem that this cautionary proverb became more widely used as a cultural catchphrase in the 1930s. In addition to being featured in Dick Tracy and The Shadow, “Crime Does Not Pay” was the title of a series of short-subject films and a spinoff radio show that were popular in the mid- to late-1930s.

A MESSAGE FROM THE TICK FOR DONALD TRUMP: “Slime does not pay...It’s wrong and it’s gross.”        The Tick        Comic cartoon superhero created by cartoonist Ben Edlund              An observation made by The Tick in Season 2 Episode 1 of the animated series (“The Little Wooden Boy and the Belly of Love”)        (Cartoon by Bill Day.)

CAGNEY’S COUNTERQUOTE: “You been reading a lot of stuff about ‘Crime don’t pay.’ Don’t be a sucker! That’s for yaps and small-timers on shoestrings. Not for people like us. You belong in the big-shot class. Both of us do.”         James Cagney, as gangster Rocky Sullivan        Lines spoken to actress Ann Sheridan in the 1938 film Angels With Dirty Faces

RUMPOLE’S OBSERVATION: “They say that crime doesn’t pay, but it’s a living, you know. Oh, yes, it’s a living...If it wasn’t for crime, the democratic process would grind to a halt.”          Leo McKern, in his role as the irascible British barrister Horace Rumpole        In the “Play for Today” episode of the BBC television series Rumpole of the Bailey (first aired December 16, 1975)

THE MYSTERY WRITERS’ VERSION: “Crime does not pay – enough.”        Motto of the Mystery Writers of America association since it’s founding in 1945        Credit for the motto is generally given to American mystery writer, editor and amateur magician Clayton Rawson (1906-1971), one of the four founding members of the organization. (The others were novelists Anthony Boucher, Lawrence Treat, and Brett Halliday.) The Mystery Writers of America is the group that presents the Edgar Awards in various categories of mystery writing each year (named in honor of Edgar Allan Poe).

THE BRITNEY SPEARS VIDEO VERSION: “If you’re young and tattooed, crime does pay.”          Kenneth Partridge         New York-based music journalist and critic        His summation of the moral of the story told in the music video for Britney Spears’ 2011 song “Criminal,” in one of his posts on the now defunct AOL Music blog.        The video features Spears and her heavily-tattooed boyfriend at the time, Jason Trawick, playing what Britney described as “a modern-day Bonnie and Clyde.” After robbing an unlucky small grocery store owner at gunpoint (with Britney brandishing the gun) they return to their hideaway to take a shower that’s steamy in more ways than one. Suddenly, the local coppers surround the place and shred the walls with machine guns. But, unlike the real Bonnie and Clyde, the amorous young thieves in the video manage to survive the hail of bullets and escape.        Who says crimes against logic (and music and acting) don’t pay?

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“A week is a long time in politics.” (Especially for voters!)

THE MODERN POLITICAL PROVERB: “A week is a long time in politics.”        Harold Wilson (1916-1995)        British Labour Party politician; Prime Minister 1964-970 & 1974-1976        A political saying widely credited to Wilson        Like any savvy politician, Wilson was willing to take credit for this oft-cited and still oft-used saying when credit was given to him. However, it’s not clear whether he actually used the line before reporters and quotation researchers began asking him when he first used it.        The Dictionary of Modern Proverbs says “no record of him using it can be found from earlier than 1968, and Wilson himself is on record saying he cannot remember when he first uttered it.” In his book Sayings of the Century, quote maven Nigel Rees speculates that “the phrase was probably first uttered at a meeting between Wilson and the Parliamentary lobby in the wake of the Sterling crisis shortly after he first took office as Prime Minister in 1964. However, Robert Carvel...recalled Wilson at a Labour Party conference in 1960 saying ‘Forty-eight hours is a long time in politics.’” At any rate, after people began attributing “A week is a long time in politics” to Wilson, he seems to have accepted the attribution and used the saying on a number of subsequent occasions.        It has come to be used most frequently as a comment on the rapid changes that can occur in voter attitudes toward candidates during the course of political campaigns.

RENTOUL’S COUNTERQUOTE: “A week is not a long time in politics; much more stays the same than changes. People do not vote for hope and vision, but for the lesser evil. And nobody really minds a divided party. Division, managed properly, can convey vitality while draining opponents of a reason to exist.”         John Rentoul        Chief Political Commentator for the UK newspaper The Independent        In his column in the October 20, 2015 issue of The Independent

CHAMBERLAIN’S PRECURSOR: “In politics, there is no use looking beyond the next fortnight.”         Joseph Chamberlain (1836-1914)        British Liberal politician        According to A.J. Balfour, the 3rd Marquess of Salisbury, Chamberlain made this remark to him in a conversation in 1886.        Cited in a letter Balfour wrote on March 24, 1886, reprinted in his book Chapters of Autobiography (published in 1930).

ONE REASON FOR TERM LIMITS: “The weak are a long time in politics.”        Neil Shand        British journalist and writer for BBC comedy shows         A quip Shand made that could apply to a long list of career politicians.         Shand said it about the long-serving British Conservative politician John Gummer. (Cited in the book Political Wit: Quips and Quotes from the Back Benches and Beyond.)

THE VANISHING CHILD’S PLAY VARIATION: “Two hours is a long time in a child's day, and when you add the two to three hours that American children typically spend watching TV, you can see that at an ever younger age, children are losing the opportunity to experience the joys and benefits of traditional play.”          Dr. Lawrence E. Shapiro and Robin K. Sprague        An observation in their book The Relaxation & Stress Reduction Workbook for Kids

DAN RATHER’S UPDATE FOR THE 24-HOUR NEWS ERA: “Overnight is a long time in politics; a week is forever.”        Dan Rather        American TV journalist        According to a post on quotation expert Barry Popik’s “Big Apple” website, Rather began using this saying and variations of it in the 1980s and has repeated it many times since.

MY 2016 UPDATE OF RATHER’S UPDATE: “A week seems like an even longer long time in politics this year, thanks to the 24-hour news coverage, Facebook posting and Tweeting about every mind-numbing absurdity of the 2016 presidential campaign.”        Robert Deis        Editor of QuoteCounterquote.com and ThisDayinQuotes.com        (Cartoon by R.J. Matson via Cagle.com)

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“I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse.”

THE ORIGINAL GODFATHER’S OFFER: “I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse.”        Mario Puzo (1920-1999)        American author and scriptwriter        The catchphrase Puzo created for the Corleone family in his 1969 novel The Godfather        This line gained worldwide fame after the 1972 movie adaptation of the novel became a blockbuster hit. It is first used in the novel by the Mafia “Godfather” Don Vito Corleone. When Italian singer and actor Johnny Fontane tells Don Corleone that a Hollywood movie executive had refused to give him a role he wanted in an upcoming film, Don Corleone tells Johnny he’ll convince the studio executive to change his mind. “He’s a businessman,” the Don explains. “I’ll make him an offer he can't refuse.”        Corleone sends his consigliere, Tom Hagen, to visit the studio exec and make a seemingly polite request to have Johnny reconsidered for the movie role. The studio exec refuses. Soon after that, he finds the severed head of his prized stud racehorse in his bed—and quickly decides to give Johnny the part. Later in the novel, Vito’s son Michael Corleone also says “I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse.”       In the movie adaptation, the famous “offer” line used by Marlon Brando as Don Vito Corleone is slightly different. Brando says “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse.” Later in the film, Al Pacino, as Michael, says “I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse.”        Of course, in the novel and film the “offer” is a veiled threat used with chilling effect. As part of our language, mentions of offers that can’t be refused are now typically used more for humorous effect.        Mario Puzo wrote The Godfather in his spare time while working as a writer for men’s pulp adventure magazines in the 1960s. For more background on this famous quote, see the post about it on my ThisDayinQuotes.com site.

PRESIDENT OBAMA’S SUPREME COURT OFFER: “In the context of the Supreme Court vacancy, President Obama’s choice of Merrick Garland may be the hardest for Republicans to reject...Garland’s nomination comes the closest to making Senate Republicans an offer they can’t afford to refuse. On the merits — and this is no slight to the other finalists; Garland simply has the longevity — he is the best qualified. He is the most moderate nominee Republicans could reasonably expect. His downside, in the view of Democrats, his age, should be a confirmation plus in the eyes of Republicans.”        Ruth Marcus        American political columnist        Commenting in her March 18, 2016 column in the Washington Post about the dilemma Republicans face if they refuse to hold hearings on or reject President Obama’s moderate nominee to replace the late Justice Scalia. If they don’t approve Judge Garland, they face the fact Hillary Clinton or Bernie Sanders could be elected president in November 2016, and their nominee could be more liberal and less palatable to Republican Conservatives.

THE MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD (BEFORE HE RETIRED): “I don’t always make an offer...But when I do, you can't refuse.”         A meme posted on MemeCrunch.com featuring the now retired “Most Interesting Man in the World.” (I miss him already.)

WEIRD AL’S POLKA PLEA: “You can scratch up my records, you can drink my booze... You can make me an offer I can't refuse But darling, please don’t wear those shoes.”        “Weird Al” Yankovic        American musician, satirist and shoe critic        Lyrics from his song “Don’t Wear Those Shoes” on his Polka Party album (1986)

A CRITIC’S VIEW OF “BOJACK HORSEMAN”: “This horse’s head is an offer you can refuse.”        Brian Lowry        TV critic for Variety magazine        In his August 13, 2014 review of the Netflix animated comedy show Bojack Horseman. The main character is a talking horse (voiced by Will Arnett) who once appeared in a popular sitcom but is now forgotten, depressed and bitter. Although most critics seem to agree with Lowry’s assessment, the show has been popular enough with viewers to be continued by Netflix for three seasons.

A CRITIC’S VIEW OF “THE GODFATHER’S REVENGE”: “An offer you might want to refuse.”        Carol Memmott        American book critic and entertainment writer        From her review of Mark Winegardner’s 2004 novel The Godfather’s Revenge, a sequel to Mario Puzo’s Godfather series. The book was a best seller, despite the opinion of Memmott.

THE POLITICALLY INCORRECT SOPRANOS JOKE: “You hear about the Chinese Godfather?  He made them an offer they couldn’t understand.”        The character Uncle Junior (played by Dominic Chianese) in The Sopranos TV series        Uncle Junior told this lame joke to his buddies in Season 1, Episode 4 of the series        Word and phrase maven Barry Popik has noted on his great site, The Big Apple, that there was an earlier version of this joke that poked fun at both gangsters and lawyers: “What do you get when you cross a gangster with an attorney? An offer you can’t understand.”

THE POSSIBLY CORRECT JUNK MAIL SOLUTION: “Here’s what I do to them and every other asshole that sends me an offer I want to refuse. I take all the mail they sent, plus whatever crap is lying around the house (used rubbers, rat shit, gum, those insert cards from other magazines) and I stuff it all into the prepaid reply envelope and send the junk mail right back.”          Josh Saitz        Editor of the Negative Capability online zine        In a post on the zine titled “How to Cope with Assholes”

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