October 31, 2009

You are what you eat, think or know (or were you?)


FAMOUS QUOTE:

“You Are What You Eat”
       Dr. Victor Hugo Lindlahr (1895-1969)
       Pioneering American health food advocate
       The title of his 1942 book, which popularized the phrase


CRITTERS COUNTERQUOTE:

“YOU ARE WHAT THEY EAT.”
       Ad slogan for the movie Critters 3 (1991) 
       One of Leonardo DiCaprio’s early films


BUDDHA’S VERSION:

“We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts we make the world.”
       Buddha (c. 563 BCE to 483 BCE)
       Indian spiritual teacher
       The Dhammapada (c. 300 BCE)


BURKE’S VERSION:

“You are what you know.”
       James Burke (b. 1936)
       British science historian
       In his book The Day the Universe Changed (1985)


TABLOID VARIATION:

“You are what you were: expert reveals how past lives control everything you do – TODAY!”
       Headline from The Weekly World News (Nov. 6, 2001)
       The world’s ONLY reliable news source (now online)

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 29, 2009

“A House Divided”


FAMOUS BIBILICAL QUOTE:

“Every city or house divided against itself shall not stand.”
       Jesus
       Quoted in the Bible, Matthew 12:25
       The inspiration for Abraham Lincoln’s famous quote


STUDENT COUNTERQUOTE:

“A horse divided against itself cannot stand.” 
       A “student blooper” 
       Quoted by Richard Lederer in The Bride of Anguished English  


ANTHROPOLIGIST’S VERSION:

“A cultural system divided against itself cannot behave in a rational manner.”
       Leslie Alvin White (1900-1975)
       American anthropologist
       Comment in 1975, quoted by Jack P. Gibbs in Control: Sociology’s Central Notion


GEORGE DIVIDED VARIATION:

“You see, right now I have Relationship George. But there is also Independent George...If Relationship George walks through this door, he will kill Independent George. A George divided against itself cannot stand!”
        George Costanza (actor Jason Alexander)
        In the “Pool Guy” episode of Seinfeld (Season 7, Episode 8, 1995)

More from Richard Lederer and Leslie A. White…

October 26, 2009

“A House Divided” – the Political Pundits Versions


LINCOLN’S FAMOUS QUOTE:

“A house divided against itself cannot stand. I believe this government cannot endure permanently half slave and half free.”
       Abraham Lincoln 
       Speech at the Republican State Convention, June 16, 1858 


OBERMANN’S VERSION:

“A house divided against itself cannot stand. I believe this government cannot endure, permanently half smart and half stupid.”
       Keith Olbermann
       Liberal media pundit
       Comment on Republican Congressman Joe Wilson yelling "You lie! at President Obama
       On MSNBC's Countdown TV show, Sept. 10, 2009


BECK’S ODD VERSION:

“Over 50% of the African-American community now believes that the cure of AIDS exists but the Government won’t release it because AIDS kills poor people. That’s frightening. A house divided against itself cannot fail.”
       Glenn Beck
       Conservative media pundit
       On his radio show, March 24, 2008 


COLBERT QUIP:

“A house divided against itself cannot stand, but it's worth squat in this market anyway.”
       Stephen Colbert
       The supposedly faux political pundit
       On his Colbert Report TV show, Jan. 13, 2009

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 24, 2009

It means never having to – say what?


The latest QuoteCounterquote.com video… 

Ryan O'Neal in Love Story (1970)
                      vs.
Vincent Price in The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971)
                      vs.
Steven Weber in The Shining (1997)
                      vs.
Klaus Kinski in Buddy Buddy (1981)
                      vs.
Jackie Gleason in The Toy (1982)

You can view this video and more quote humor videos on my YouTube channel.


More movie quote stuff…

October 22, 2009

“Half the world…”


FAMOUS AUSTEN QUOTE:

“One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.” 
       Jane Austen (1775-1817)
       British novelist
       Emma (1815)


HOWE’S COUNTERQUOTE:

“Half the world does not know how the other half lives, but is trying to find out.”
       E.W. Howe (1853-1937)
       American journalist and novelist
       Quoted in The Concise Columbia Dictionary of Quotations


MR. MOTO’S VERSION:

“Half the world spends its time laughing at the other half, and both are fools.”
       Actor Peter Lorre as Mr. Moto
       In the 1937 film Think Fast, Mr. Moto 


JEFFERSON’S VARIATION:

“Millions of innocent men, women, and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burnt, tortured, fined, imprisoned; yet we have not advanced one inch towards uniformity. What has been the effect of coercion? To make one half the world fools, and the other half hypocrites.”
       Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) 
       Third President of the United States of America
       Notes on the State of Virginia (1787)

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

Further reading and viewing…

October 20, 2009

Blessed are the cheesemakers?


FAMOUS BIBLE QUOTE:

“Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.”
       Jesus Christ
       In the Sermon on the Mount, Matthew 5:9


SATIRICAL COUNTERQUOTE:

“Ah, blessed are the peacemakers – Colt, Marlin, Winchester, and now Obama, winner of the Nobel Peace Prize, brought to you by Alfred Nobel, inventor of dynamite and smokeless gun powder, son of the man who taught the world to mine harbors and shipping channels.”
       Newspaper columnist Casey Jones
       In his Salt Lake Journal Tribune column, Oct. 16, 2009


SATIRICAL PYTHONQUOTE:

GREGORY (having trouble hearing Jesus): “What was that?”
MAN: “I think it was ‘Blessed are the cheesemakers.’”
MRS. GREGORY: “What’s so special about the cheesemakers?”
GREGORY: “Well, obviously, it’s not meant to be taken literally. It refers to any manufacturers of dairy products.” 
       The Monty Python movie Life of Brian (1979)
       In the Sermon on the Mount scene

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 19, 2009

You can lead a horticulture…


FAMOUS DOROTHY PARKER QUOTE:

“You can lead a horse to water
But you can’t make him drink.
You can lead a horticulture
But you can’t make her think”

       Dorothy Parker (1893-1967)
       American writer and critic
       At a gathering of the Algonquin Round Table wits
       Quoted in You Might as Well Live (1970)


LEATHERNECK COUNTERQUOTE:

“They say ‘you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.’ In the Marine Corps, you can make that horse wish to hell he had.”
       Marine drill instructor Sgt. Fred Larson
       Maxim (c. 1965) quoted on the Leatherneck website


LAUREL COUNTERQUOTE:

“You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.”
       Stan Laurel (1890-1965) 
       British comic actor
       In the Laurel and Hardy film Brats (1930)

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 16, 2009

“The moral equivalent of war”


QUOTE:

“What we now need to discover in the social realm is the moral equivalent of war; something heroic that will speak to man as universally as war does, and yet will be as compatible with their spiritual selves as war has proved to be incompatible.”
       William James (1842-1910)
       American psychologist and philosopher
       The Will to Believe (1897)


COUNTERQUOTE:

“Remember...how Jimmy Carter asked Americans to respond to a mere rise in the price of crude oil with ‘the moral equivalent of war’? What were we supposed to do, shame the gas attendant to death?”
       P.J. O'Rourke (b. 1947)
       American journalist, author and political satirist
       All the Trouble in the World (1994)


9-11QUOTE:

“The bombers of Manhattan represent fascism with an Islamic face, and there's no point in any euphemism about it...Loose talk about chickens coming home to roost is the moral equivalent of the hateful garbage emitted by Falwell and Robertson, and exhibits about the same intellectual content.”
       Christopher Hitchens (b. 1949)
       British-born American journalist and social critic
       Talking about people who tried to justify the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks
       In his column in The Nation, Oct. 8, 2001


PARTISANQUOTE:

“This is the moral equivalent of an abusive guy who puts his wife in the hospital and then gets mad at the doctors who can’t send her home as soon as they had hoped.”
       Howard Dean (b. 1948)
       Democratic Party leader
       Talking about Republicans who attack President Barack Obama's economic stimulus plan
       July 29, 2009, on MSNBC's Countdown show

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 14, 2009

History repeats itself again


FAMOUS KARL MARX QUOTE:

“History repeats itself, first as tragedy, second as farce.”
       Karl Marx (1818-1883)
       German philosopher and political theorist
       Paraphrase of a passage in Marx's 1852 essay, “Eighteenth Brumaire of Louis Bonaparte”


HISTORIAN’S COUNTERQUOTE:

“History repeats itself. Historians repeat each other.”
       Philip Guedalla (1899-1944)
       British historian and biographer
       In Supers and Supermen (1920)

 
GRIMMY’S VERSION:

“The History Channel repeats itself.”
       The Mother Goose and Grimm comic strip, June 2006
       Written and drawn by Mike Peters (b. 1943)


ENIGMATIC BECK VARIATION:

“Hollywood people and all these liberals, all these just great thinkers, they don't understand that history repeats itself…They can't recognize themselves that there are only like four movies that have ever been made, and half of them star Gene Hackman and the other half star Bruce Willis.”
       Glenn Beck (b. 1964)
       Conservative TV and radio talk show host
       On his radio show, February 11, 2008

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 12, 2009

Hyphenated Americans


TEDDY’S FAMOUS QUOTE:

“There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism.”
      
Theodore Roosevelt (1858-1919)
       American politician and 26th President
       Campaign speech in New York City, October 12, 1915


ANOTHER PRESIDENT’S VARIATION:

“Any man who carries a hyphen about with him carries a dagger that he is ready to plunge into the vitals of this Republic.”
       Woodrow Wilson (1856-1924)
       American politician and 28th President
       Speech in Pueblo, Colorado, Sept. 25, 1919


OLBERMANN COUNTERQUOTE:

“We have been here when President Woodrow Wilson insisted that the Espionage Act was necessary to save American lives, only to watch him use that Act to prosecute 2,000 Americans, especially those he disparaged as ‘Hyphenated Americans,’ most of whom were guilty only of advocating peace in a time of war.”
       Keith Olbermann (b. 1959)
       Liberal-leaning MSNBC news journalist and author
       On his "Countdown" show, Oct . 19, 2006


RUSH’S COUNTER-COUNTERQUOTE:

“The country does not want to be segmented...If the Democrat Party is giving us African-Americans, Hispanic-Americans, gay-Americans, homosexual-Americans, lady-Americans, female-Americans, all this hyphenated-American stuff has come from your party because you desire people segmented!”
       Rush Limbaugh (b. 1951)
       Conservative talk show host and author
       On his radio show, March 17, 2008

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 11, 2009

Just say NO! NOE! NO-J!


NANCY’S FAMOUS ANTI-DRUG SLOGAN:

“Just say no!”
       Nancy Reagan (b. 1921)
       Wife of President Ronald Reagan
       Anti-drug slogan she popularized, starting in 1983


DEMOCRATS’ ANTI-DAN SLOGAN:

“JUST SAY NOE”
       Slogan on a 1992 campaign button worn by Democrats
       Mocking Dan Quayle’s misspelling of “potato” as “potatoe”


STEWART’S ANTI-O.J. VERSION:

“Just say NO-J.”
       1995 TV ads for Jon Stewart’s Daily Show
       Satirizing the public’s fascination with TV coverage of the O.J. Simpson murder trial

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Comments? Questions? Corrections? Post them on my quotations Facebook group.

October 9, 2009

I don't care what they say about me…

QUOTE:

“I don’t care what you say about me, as long as you spell my name right.”
       George M. Cohan (1878-1942)
       American songwriter, playwright and producer
       Attributed comment to a reporter. (Also attributed to other celebrities.)

---> See more stuff by and about Cohan

 

COUNTERQUOTE:

“I don’t care as long as they spell my name right on my check.”
       Eric Jerome Dickey (b. 1961)
       American author 
       Quip in his novel Sleeping with Strangers (2007)

---> See more stuff by Dickey

 

TWAINQUOTE:

“I don’t mind what the opposition say of me, so long as they don’t tell the truth.”
       Mark Twain (1835-1910)
       American author and humorist
       Speech in Hartford, Connecticut, Oct. 26, 1880

---> See more stuff by and about Twain

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